Saviour King

I could listen to this song on repeat.all.day.long.  And tonight that's just what I'm doing as everyone else is snoozing away.

I have a million things to do in preparation for Christmas.  Like sew/embroider last minute gifts.  But instead I'm finding myself just wanting to worship at His feet.  Singing praises to Him for what He has done.

For He is good.

Even when we feel as if the world around us is collapsing.

Even when we feel alone, in what should be the most joyous time of the year.

Even when we feel inadequate in our daily lives.

Even when we don't understand the why's of this life.

He alone is good.

I read on Twitter the other day, "your presence is the best present you can give your kids this year."

Being presence in their little lives, drawing from their sweet little minds, seeing His love through their innocent little hearts.  Loving and praising them for even the littlest of things they have done.

What if this could ring true with our Saviour King.

Our presence is the best gift we can give Him this year.

Being in His presence, allowing Him to be present in our lives, drawing strength from Him, seeing His love through the hearts of others.  Loving and praising Him even for the littlest of things He has done.

After all, He is the reason we celebrate the season of Christmas.  And all He wants is to love on us.

This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. 1 John 4:9

So what better way to celebrate than at His feet...worshiping and thanking Him.

Loving Him.

For He alone is good.

This Christmas season, we love you Lord, we worship you.  You are our God and you alone are good.

And now the weak say I have strength
By the spirit of power
And now the poor stand and confess
That my portion is served and I'm more than blessed

And now our hearts burn with a flame
A fire consuming all for your son's holy name
And with the heavens we declare you our king
We love you Lord
We worship you
You are our God
You alone are good.

And now your church shine as the bride
That you saw in your heart as you offered up your life
And now the lost being welcomed home by the saved and redeemed, those adopted as your own

And now our hearts burn with a flame
A fire consuming all for your son's holy name
And with the heavens we declare you our king
We love you Lord
We worship you
You are our God
You alone are good.

You asked your son
To carry this
The heavy cross
Our weight of sin

I love you Lord
I worship you

Hope which was lost
Now stands renewed

I give my life
To honour this
The love of Christ
The Saviour King

James - revisited

*revised from when originally posted

My house is dark and quiet.  The only sounds are coming from B's room and his radio, singing praises to the newborn King.

And while I should be sleeping, I'm wide awake.  With lots on my mind.  Seems the nighttime when all is quiet is when I can actually think.  Guess that is most mommas.

But as I lay in my bed thinking about life, which lately has been really trying for our family, I'm reminded to humble myself before the Lord.  I also reminded that struggles in this life is where we learn to really hold onto to our faith.  When our faith is tested, it is only building our endurance.

"Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.  For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow.  So let it grow, for when your endurance is fully developed you will be perfect and complete, needing nothing.  If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you."  James 1:2-5 NLT

When struggles or conflict rises, I think it's human nature to seek guidance or wisdom.  Or just when life in general gets tough or has us down. 

But true wisdom comes from God.  
James 3: 13 NLT says,
"If you are wise and understand God’s ways, prove it by living an honorable life, doing good works with the humility that comes from wisdom."

And not sure if it's just me, but it seems when one thing starts heading south, they ALL do!  The "when it rains, it pours!" kind of deal.

But maybe that's the way God intended it to be.  Because for it is when we are weak, He is strong!

Which a good friend reminded me of today.  That God puts us in uncomfortable situations in order to lean on Him when we are weak and draw strength from Him.  Not from ourselves.

When we do this, we have to humble ourselves before Him.  Because this journey isn't about us, but Him.

How easy that is to forget!

The world tells us it's okay to be angry, to get even, to feel as if we are entitled to something.  When that could be farther from the truth.  And the devil also wants us to believe these lies.

I am quickly realizing I am not exempt from these lies.  Or from uncomfortable situations, or hard times, or the downs of life.

For during my struggles, it's not only a time for me to draw on His strength, but a time to grow in His word.  Since that's where I go for guidance, comfort, and peace.

To humble myself before Him.  In all of His glorious wonder & majesty.

So while searching and seeking to help through this season of my life, I'm brought to the book of James.  For several times through James, it takes about humbling yourself before the Lord.  And that is where God meets me. 

In my brokenness, in my sinful ways, in my troubles.

Sweet friends, I am in NO way perfect and I fall short on many occasions.  I do not have it all together.  I do lots of things wrong and lots of times wish I could change the way I did them.  But I can't change the past, I can only work on today.

"Indeed, we all make many mistakes. For if we could control our tongues, we would be perfect and could also control ourselves in every other way."  James 3:2 NLT

I still have so much work to do on myself.  But it is with each struggle that I am reminded I cannot do it without His grace and mercy.  And mostly His forgiveness.

And humbling myself before Him means quickly forgiving those who have hurt me.  It means making it right to those who I have hurt.  Even when that wasn't my intentions.  It means throwing my pride aside.  It means loving the unloveable.  It means removing "my feelings" and doing what's right even when I don't feel like it.  Making peace.

Especially when this is what His word tells me to do.

James 3:17-18 NLT
17 But the wisdom from above is first of all pure. It is also peace loving, gentle at all times, and willing to yield to others. It is full of mercy and good deeds. It shows no favoritism and is always sincere. 18 And those who are peacemakers will plant seeds of peace and reap a harvest of righteousness.

It also means praising Him for our struggles, uncomfortable situations, and the downs of this life.  Praising Him for loving us enough to redeem us every.single.time we fall short.  Praising Him for allowing us to lean on Him and rest in His arms.

Praising Him even though we feel alone in this world, we never are thanks to His unfailing love. 

My hope is that if you are facing any kind of conflict in your life, you will draw on Him for your strength.  That you can find it in your heart to forgive and love each other as Christ loves us.  And yes in this life, you will have troubles and be in placed in uncomfortable situations but that's where He loves to meet us. 

That is where He is able to take the mess in our lives and transform it into something beautiful.

Know there is nothing that can separate you from His love.  He knows we are going to make mistakes, which is why He took on the Cross for us.  I pray you can find encouragement through your struggles.  That you are able to praise Him through them.  He is never far away and He sees your despair.  Reach out to Him and He will show you His ways.  Which are always pure, kind, and loving.

Humble yourselves before the Lord, and he will lift you up in honor. James 4:10

Some things you just can't deny...

There are some things you just can't deny in this life.  And I'm not talking about denying the trivial things.  Like my love for a new pair of shoes or a fresh haircut.

For my birthday, I got not one but TWO pairs of shoes.  I must say that it made me feel like a whole, new woman.  I felt refreshed.  Ready to go.

But as my closet is filled to the brim, with many things that I very seldom wear or even notice, I have to wonder what it feels like to simply "need" something.

I mean truly need.

Then I'm reminded that God calls us to love big in this world.  To love like He did.  I recently finished Francis Chan's book and study, Crazy Love and it got me to thinking.

What does this mean for me, for my family?  To love like He did.  To live so passionately for God, it would be undeniable.

That I would essentially lose myself for His glory.

As I sat on my sewing room floor, dreaming up this monster I've been wanting to make Brady for sometime now...I begin to pick through my fabric scraps for just the right ones.  I wanted it to be perfect.  I wanted it to reflect the love I have for him.  I wanted it to be the best.

I started piecing him together.  Anxious of what the finished project might look like.  When all of a sudden, excitement begin to rise up in me.

I'm talking the pure joy kind of excitement.  The kind that feels as if you are bursting at the seams.

I was overcome with such joy, I noticed tears welling up in my eyes.  So many that all my pieces of fabrics were just a blur.

In that moment, it was exactly what I needed.  To hear the word of God speak.  To whisper in his ever-loving voice to me.  To hear truth.

It was what I had been praying for.

"This is what I want you to do: ask the Father for whatever is in keeping with the things I've revealed to you.  Ask in my name, according to my will, and he'll most certainly give it to you.  Your joy will be a river overflowing its banks!"  John 16:24, MSG

There is nothing on this earth or in my closet or on my feet that could refresh me the way He does.

And there is nothing like losing myself in order to follow the plans he has laid out before us.

Even if I'm scared.  Even if it's what I've praying about.  Earnestly seeking his wisdom.

There is no denying when God speaks to your heart. 

"I want to be near, near to your heart

Loving the world, hating the dark

I want to see dry bones living again

Singing as one..."

I'm not ready.

There are lots of things in life, I feel unprepared for.  Nothing can prepare for what motherhood will be like.  Sure people can tell you and give you a glimpse of what it's like for them but it will in no way prepare for what it will really be like, for yourself.  And often people tell you only the things that are not so good.  Like how you'll never sleep again or kiss all your sleep goodbye.

While yes that is somewhat true seeing how Brady has yet to start sleeping through the night, it pales in comparison to what motherhood does bring to the table.

In two short days, Brady will turn 11 months old.  How?  I am not ready.

It seems that as each month passes I am in disbelief.  How could it go by so quickly?  I'm not ready.

And with each passing month, he reaches another milestone.  Or does something that just amazes me.  Which only screams how quickly he is growing up.

Yet, I'm still not ready.

I want to hold on to that sweet 7lb 4oz little boy that I brought into this world almost a year ago.  I don't want to forget how tiny he was or how he was almost taken to NICU due to fluid in his lungs.  I don't want to forget the miracle of life that turned our us into a family of three.

I just want to relish in those moments.  For that is what motherhood is about, not that Brady still doesn't sleep through the night or that

It is about your heart overflowing with pride and joy as you watch him take not one, but two steps all on his own like he did just this morning.  Or how when he learns something new, like being able to steer or navigate this little push around train.  Or when he sees someone he knows to say "hi!" in the sweetest little voice ever.

Even when I'm not ready.  Not ready to let go and accept that he is in fact growing up, right before our eyes.

At lightening speed, it seems.

There is nothing that can compare your heart or your head for what motherhood will be like.  It is definitely a rollercoaster of emotions and while I don't want to admit it, I know this is only the beginning.

But there is one thing I can say, it is better than I ever could imagine.  This is why we decided as a family that I would stay home.  These are the moments that make sacrificing money or a career so worth it.

Being his mom is one of the greatest blessings ever.  I am in awe of our Creator who created Brady, before I even knew it.

And it is a gentle reminder, that God never leaves out the details.  He knew what this momma's heart needed today.

These are the moments, days I live for.  Even if I'm not ready for them.

Our Day

There was nothing spectacular about our day, but it is one I don't want to forget.

Brady got up earlier than usual and all I wanted was sleep.  I was able to distract him in his crib for about 30 minutes but then he let me know he was ready to be up!  Ha!

This is such a fun age.  Just when I think he can't get any sweeter or cuter or funnier or steal my heart anymore - he does.  His little personality is starting to show through and it is just precious.  He is also quite the cuddler.

We tried a new breakfast food - apple yogurt oatmeal.  Typical breakfast is some kind of fruit mixed with oatmeal, but today we added yogurt.  He was a fan and it didn't seem to upset his stomach either.  Yea!  I'm hoping he is growing out of his milk/dairy allergen.

He is really into playing these days.  When he's not exploring around the house or trying to eat the dog food or trying to sneak up the stairs...he will sit and play.  I love it!  I love watching him.  The other evening we went over to Nanna and Dandy's and he came back with a tambourine.  He loves music and he knows how to play it. 

He also likes to get into the cabinets and today he found himself a real treat.  Or so he thought...

OREOS...Coco couldn't wait for her cookie. Ha!  It's like he is asking for her to "help!"  They are a mess!

This cracks me up..."don't even think about taking them away?!"

 

Him and Coco are such great friends.  Partners in crime.  He was not a happy baby when I took them away!  I just laughed, is that wrong??

After nap and lunch, we went out to see "dada" for a bit.  Always great to see him and get him out of the house.  He loves "driving" the tractor.  Such excitement for one little boy!

Once we got home, it was time nap time again.  Yea - mommy needed a nap! ;)  Me and my sweet boy snuggled up in the "big bed" and took a 2 hour nap!  I love these times with him.  Probably some of my favorites.  I know it won't be too long that he will not want to snuggle up with momma and sleep.

And I woke up to the house smell amazing!  I had put a roast in the crockpot around lunch and honestly had forgot about it.  Which is why the crockpot is one amazing invention, ha!  I actually felt rested this afternoon to make a delicious home-cooked meal.  I've been feeling so "down" lately so this was a great blessing in my day.  I ended up making homemade mashed potatoes and green bean casserole to go with the roast.  I even brewed iced tea.  And we even ate together at the table on real plates.  It was a nice little meal.  Brady even got to enjoy it.  He had green beans, bananas, boiled potatoes, and some roast.  He is really into feeding himself.  He sure is a messy eater but Reno and Coco don't mind, ha ;)

I think he's a fan!!!

Daddy said he's a real man now since he's had meat!  So silly! 

Daddy gave Brady a shower while I cleaned up.  His first shower mind you.  Haha!  Brady went down super easy and I just realized what a great day it was.  And what an amazing little life I've been blessed with.  With school starting, I was kind of bummed I wasn't back with the kiddos but thankfully God has been showing me such grace these days.  Because "my job" is here teaching Brady, loving him, and being the best mom I can be.  So while our day was nothing spectacular, it definitely is one I don't want to forget!

"Train your child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it." Proverbs 22:6

Following You

Yesterday, we attended the early church service. It is also the contemporary service. We also decided to try out Sunday school. Both of these a first for us.

Pastor Mark started a sermon series on "Hurts, Habits, & Hang-ups." Essentially letting go of the things that we hold on to, or use to keep us from furthering our relationship with Jesus. I would be totally lying if I didn't think to myself, "oh I don't have any of those!" When I look at my life, I like to think it's a pretty decent, good life. I am extremely blessed, thankfully, I'm not addicted to drugs or alcohol, no I haven't been terribly hurt by anyone in my life - but as Pastor Mark preached about "hang-ups", I realized those things don't have to be major issues or trials in your life. They can be simple as eating too much or over-spending.

First, I realized who am I to question God on why I am having a son rather than a daughter. Who am I to question his will for my life? Clearly, He knows best and why do I continue to question/wonder/and let's just say flat out discredit the one I know has my heart in the palm of his hand. The one I know has a life for me better than my wildest dreams.

Part of it comes from fear and being afraid of what might happen if I allow myself to get closer, or to truly follow His will for my life. One of those - be careful what you ask for kind of deals. Knowing that if that is his will for me and I truly want to live my life for Him, that I must not be afraid or anxious.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:6-7

I also realized that we often use control as a way of hiding behind those hurts, habits, & hang-ups.

Let's face it, it is our human nature to want to control every facet of our life. If we can control something, we feel more comfortable, we feel as if we have it all together. When clearly, the reality is we are probably unraveling at the other end. Or at any moment, things are going to come crashing down on us.

Why do we feel the need to control? Pastor Mark said because of the 4 F's: fear, failure, frustration, and fatigue. These are the things used in playing God.

Ouch! Am I not guilty of all 4 of those?

Fear and control go hand in hand. For me, fear drives me to want to be in control because I don't like not knowing what is to come, whether good or bad. But scripture tells us fear is not of the Lord.

God did not give us a spirit that makes us afraid but a spirit of power and love and self-control.
2 Timothy 1:7

And of course no one wants to fail or be looked at as a failure. But I think it is through our failures, we truly experience God's grace and mercy.

Frustration just causes one to become angry and resentful. Building up walls if you will.

While fatigue allows us to make excuses, put things off another day.

For years, I have prayed for God to lead me to a place where I can do the work of His kingdom. To place me where I can serve Him. That I would find "my calling" as we often like to say. What is my purpose here on earth? I think our whole life is a journey in serving & seeking Him, regardless of where we are or what we are doing at this particular moment in our life. We are always seeking a will and a purpose because I believe that is what makes this life a journey, our own written story.

If we didn't continue to seek and search for His next plan, step, or will for our life - we wouldn't experience the greatness that God has to offer. He didn't ask his disciples to follow him for a little while or a few months but yet their whole lives.

And that is where a simply comment can change your life forever. Where following Him can sometimes be complicated, only because we, the flesh make it that way. Goes back to that whole, need to be in control issue.

You see, while I was completely convicted yesterday at church on many different levels, I realized that God listens to your every word, prayer, and thought. He knows your heart inside, out. And regardless of my hurts, habits, & hung-ups - He loves me more than I could ever know.

And yesterday, He wanted me to know He is real.

Real in the sense that He has it covered because He has already written my story. He knows what is to come and what's next and if I want to be "real" then I will follow Him regardless of how hard of decision I have to make.

He is quick to remind me...he was scared, he was second-guessing when he was in the garden preparing to die for our sins. He was ridiculed and mocked, beaten and bruised BUT He still found strength to carry the cross and go through with what was the plan/will for His life. Dying on the cross for all of mankind. Wow!

So whatever your hurt, habit, or hang-up is will you still follow Him when you are called?

I hope and pray I can and will.

After all, He gave his life for me, for you.

And my life is all I have to give...if this life I lose, I will follow you.

For I stand in awe of all I see.

In Due Time...

Warning: this is a rather lengthy post & one that you might call "deep!" But it is as real as it gets for me...

"Humble yourselves, therefore, under God's mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due time."
1 Peter 5:6

So I will admit, I am probably my own worst critic. I guess I have to also admit I can tend to be a cynical person. I realize I have lots to learn about myself but lately I have been learning a lot. Some good, some not so good.

You see, the thing is I tend to allow myself get caught up in my struggles, in the things that are going wrong - instead of what's is going right. I tend to see myself as unworthy, hopeless, and undeserving. But the truth of the matter is none of those things are true. So why do I struggle so much with this issue?

If I have learned anything in all my struggles & suffering during the past 9 months, it is that God's love will never fail me. Even when I turn away.

It is so often that I ask myself for answers and it is so often He answers me. Maybe not the way I was expecting or maybe in not the timing I was hoping. But the beautiful thing about all of this & that is that it has allowed me to really dig into His word.

You see I was baptized when I was in the 9th grade. I remember that day as if it was yesterday. I remember the alter call. I remember feeling so vulnerable, feeling so ashamed, and feeling so broken. But what I remember most was the feeling of grace and mercy washing over me & my sins.

I knew I was "his called, chosen, & faithful one."

I think I had a preconceived notion, that that meant I was "exempt" from trials & tribulations. Or more I am just a naive person. I have lived a rather charmed life. Even as a child and I know that is more than most people can say. So now that I am experiencing "life" it is definitely an eye opener to knowing that life is not a bowl full of cherries.

Disappointment is hard for me. I despise disappointment. Just ask AB ;) But yet I often hold on & linger to the disappointments of life. AB often calls me "rain cloud" and it is true. I'd rather relish in my sorrow, than rejoice in my blessings. I think some of it is human nature and some of it is simply the feeling of unworthiness.

So if I know I was "his called, chosen, & faithful one" - why would I feel like this, you ask or really I ask myself?

In doing Beth Moore's Revelation Bible study (which I HIGHLY recommend) - God has revealed himself in so many ways, that I can't even keep track. Lately, I have been blatantly asking him to "reveal himself to me...", "show me what is you are trying to teach me..." let me just say be careful what you wish or ask for! (I actually wrote another post about this last week but haven't had the guts to post it.)

Not only has He revealed himself but I have learned more things about myself, about the love of Jesus, and just about the Bible in general. There are so many magnificent things about God's love that just amazes me. I literately am in awe of Him! I am also more in love with Him, than ever before. In the beginning Beth talks about the church (which sister, we ARE the church - you & i) has forsaken their first love. (Revelation 2:4) I think it happens and we don't even realize it.

The most beautiful thing about our struggles is we know in due time, he will lift us up. He will lift us up out of that pit. You see, how can we be over-comers if we have nothing to overcome. God created us in his image and he created us to be over-comers. To conquer! Even in death, we overcome! And he never said it would be easy. AB so often tells me "if it were easy, everyone would be doing it..." and I think this is so true about life. Life is straight up hard. Life is cruel. I know I have talked about that before. But sister girl...this life is NOT forever! Thank you Jesus! What is forever is our eternal life with our King of Kings, Lord of Lords.

While I often get caught up in my selfish needs & wants of this world which tell me I am "unworthy". I am also getting caught up more & more in the miraculous love of Jesus, which tell me I am more worthy than ever! I have had to surrender myself all over again as if I was sitting in the pew the day I accepted him in my heart. Over ten years ago.

I realize now I can't really truly understand the depths and power of his love without having to walk through the valleys. Jesus also walked through a dark time, right before he would die for me, for my sins! My sufferings will never compare to the suffering he faced the day he was nailed to the cross.

My mom told me back in November on my birthday that she wishes I would see myself the way Christ sees me. The way he sees my heart. After telling her some of things I have learned and the way I view things differently. Like through my experiences, I have a new found compassion for the homeless. Jesus would often fellowship with the least likely of people. The most of broken spirits and the most humble of people. Mom said something to me that I often repeat to myself "looks like it is good to be in the valley..." and you know she is so right.

This morning, I was reading in 1 Peter and God opened my eyes up to so many things. I realize this post is rather long but I just can't leave this part out (I don't want to forget any of what I'm learning). In 1 Peter, the apostle Peter offers hope and encouragement to suffering Christians. The faith and hope Peter writes about amazes me. Mostly because he is writing during the great persecution under Nero and Peter is executed during this time. How many of us can say we would boldly stand up for Jesus, even if it meant our own life would be taken. Essentially in 1 Peter 1, Peter says that yes, you will "suffer grief of all kinds of trials...and these have come so that your faith - of greater wroth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire - may be proved genuine and may result in praise, glory & honor..." (read 1 Peter 1:6-9). In the footnotes, it says "We must accept trials as part of the refining process that burns away impurities and prepares us to meet Christ. Trials teach us patience and help us grow to be the kind of people God wants."

Can I get an amen?!?! This is why I am so in awe of Him. He never ceases to amaze me. To show me the why's of life. To assure me, all of this is part of his perfect plan. I love, love, love it!

I want to soak up every moment that God reveals himself to me. Every moment he showers his grace & mercy on me. For the first time in a long time, my spirit is filled with his heavenly spirit. This girl feels the holy spirit inside her again. This girl feels a love that she knows is only from Jesus. This girl knows that there is none like Jesus.

I know I will experience more struggles throughout this life and I know they will be struggles of a different kind. But I also know that in due time...my glories & riches will be heaven, not in this world or on this earth.

I also know that my struggles are a part of my story and testimony. My song that one day will be sang in heaven. And I want to it be a sweet, sweet song...so whatever this life may bring me, I pray through it all, it only brings Him glory!

"Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy, and where thieves do not break in and steal. For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also." Matthew 6:19-21

If you are going through struggles in your life and feel hopeless, please know there is hope. I will soon post about my struggle with depression. Also, (I normally would never do this on here but I feel led to do it) if you have never asked Jesus to be ruler over your life and would like to, I would love to prayer with you! I never want anyone to miss out on the love of Jesus.

Thank you Lord Jesus for a peace without understanding, a peace only you can give. Thank you for suffering on the cross so that I may have eternal life...a life without suffering, without sadness, without darkness. Thank you for accepting me time and time again, even when I doubt or feel unworthy - when truthfully because I am yours, I am worthy! You created me and made me in your image and I know you, God, makes no mistakes!

"They will make war against the Lamb, but the Lamb will overcome them because he is Lord of lords and King of kings—and with him will be his called, chosen and faithful followers." Revelation 17:14

Hope

Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

Romans 5:3-5

Rise & Shine

So this morning I woke up singing this...takes me way back! Way back to the days of children's church & Sunday school. Come on you know you wanna sing along and maybe even do the hand motions - HA!



Rise & shine & give God the glory, glory!

Floody, floody...love it! :)

Beautiful, the mess we are!

So it's a new week & I am rather excited. For what? I'm not sure...because it's a beautiful day outside & I just think this spring is going to bring great things to us!

AB & I had a fabulous weekend. Lots of relaxation & just hanging out...my favorite! AB has Friday afternoon offs & that is our day to spend just us two. Friday is also "Fried Rice Friday!" We have a local Chinese restaurant that I just love...best fried rice & egg rolls ever! Well, in my opinion anyway. So when we aren't rushing out of town for the weekend, we always hit up Tai Pei for "Friday Rice Friday!" I get the same thing every time...egg drop soup, special fried rice - no shrimp & egg roll. So yummy! That is one thing about moving to SA is that AB & I get to spend more time with each other more than ever before & I truly cherish those moments.

Friday afternoon, we decided to check out the SA Botanical Gardens. And I am so glad we did! It was just beautiful & serene. AB learned in his Masters program that it is a proven scientific fact that flowers/nature/green spaces make you happier! I couldn't agree more. We were about 3/4 way through and I told AB, this place just makes me HAPPY! We ended up getting a year long membership, which allows us to bring up to 6 guests at a time. How fun! So anyone that comes to visit us, we'll be hitting up the Botanical Gardens. I promise you won't be disappointed. And I don't even consider myself an outdoor or flower kind of person but I thoroughly enjoyed it. We had to get back quickly so AB could watch the Aggies BTHO Utah State! We won't even discuss the game on Sunday...it wasn't a good afternoon at our house.

SA Botanical Gardens

Saturday, we planned to take a day trip to Fredericksburg but the weather decided to put a damper on those plans. Saturday was cold and rainy! The sun later to decided to show its face but it was still too windy & cold to go. So instead we went to Helotes to have a hamburger at Bobby J's. And OH. MY. Hands down best hamburger I have ever eaten! That is also another place, if you come to visit you must experience. It was our 2nd time to eat there & it was just as good if not better than the 1st time. I'm a little upset I didn't take a picture of the burger, ha! Afterward, AB took me to the little antique shops in the old part of Helotes. Well, more like I shopped while AB sat in the truck. He walked into one store & turned around & went back to the truck. Ha! I love that man...he later told me "there was way too much old junk in there for me!" But thanks babe for taking me & patiently waiting for me while I shopped.

Sunday, AB went to church without me because I wasn't feeling well. Or more like didn't very well so he let me sleep in while he went to church. Such a sweetie! Later we went to Sam's Club to get our membership that AB's parents gave us back in December...and shop, of course! Woohoo! Sam's was fun! AB was excited about the big ol' pack of Velveeta shells & cheese. I was excited about the 2 pack of white vinegar for only $3. I use a lot of vinegar for household cleaners & in laundry. There were so many things I wanted but well...didn't need OR really my waist/hips/booty/all of the above DO NOT need!

I posted last week about my new schedule...well we also have a new weekly menu in our house. If I am not prepared. Then well dinner doesn't get prepared. Which then leads to eating out...Which then leads to all kinds of bad things. So I will now do a weekly menu AND get this, follow it! That's the key to success here, right?! So below is the new Beyer weekly menu with a shopping list at the bottom. That way I can take this to the store...see what we're having for the week & buy strictly off this list. So far...so good - okay today is only the first day but I do feel good about this. And excited to finally have some order in my life. This week are all NEW recipes so if they turn out, I will post the recipes.

On my way home from the grocery store this morning...I heard the new Amy Grant (who doesn't love Amy Grant?!) song on K-Love & wow! Amy Grant's voice is so heavenly and this song was like a "breath of fresh air" to me. This part really tugged at my heart.

"We pour out our miseries...God just hears a melody. Beautiful, the mess we are...the honest cries of breaking hearts...are better than a Hallelujah."



Beautiful, the mess we are! Oh...only makes me want to only pour my heart out even more to Him - knowing that He loves me just as much as when I'm crying out to Him as He does when I'm singing praises to Him. I love it...and I hope this song also blesses you today!

Happy Monday, sweet friends!

Go Light Your World

As we said goodbye to Mom-mom today and celebrated her life - this song could not be more appropriate. The pastor talked about Mom-mom and how she was a lamplight rather than a starlight during her time here on earth. Being a lamplight for the sake of Christ and not a starlight for the sake of recognition. We all have the ability to be a lamplight in this life when we allow Christ to shine in us and through us.

"Take your candle and go light your world...make us a beacon in the darkest of times."

"Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light into my path."
Psalm 119:105

It's hard to surrender to what I can't see...

Allen and I were talking today during lunch about life and the things going on right now in our lives...while Allen has a wonderful job, work has slowed down tremendously and while we know God knows the desires of our heart - we also want to be prepared for the worst (like if they decide to cut his hours or the dreadful words "be laid-off"). Allen was the last person to be hired and we all know what that means...last to be hired, first to go! All we can do at this point is pray, believe, and trust! All such very SIMPLE things, right? Ha! One those easier said than done kind of deals. And then instantly I said to Allen...it's hard to surrender to what I can't see but that's okay because I'm giving in to something heavenly - then I thought wait, that is a song & wow it totally corresponds to what I posted earlier this morning. Coincidence again??? I told Allen I need to put that on my blog & his reply...addendum! I love him!! There is NO talk in the office of Allen being laid off but please pray for him/us - we are hopeful for more work & soon!

So I thought I would share this amazing song with you "Whatever You're Doing" by Sanctus Real.

"Whatever You're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but I believe
You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something Heavenly"

Take Up the Easy Yoke

I mentioned in a previous post that I am reading the Joyce Meyer book - "Enjoying Where You Are On the Way to Where You Are Going." I also read a nightly (or I at least try, just being realistic) devotional by Joyce Meyer called "Ending Your Day Right" which was given to me by my mother several years ago. Tuesday night, I tucked myself in bed read my nightly devotional then began reading my other Joyce Meyer book.

I opened my devotional to September 15 and the headline reads "Take Up the Easy Yoke" and the scripture reads: "Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle (meek) and humble (lowly) in heart, and you will find rest (relief and ease and refreshment and recreation and blessed quiet) for your souls." Matthew 11:29

In the "Enjoying Where You Are...", I am still on the subject of simplicity - this particular topic was "The Simple Approach" and essentially Joyce discusses how Jesus is not controlled by circumstances and by the demands of other people, but instead He takes the simple approach. As I am reading, the scripture Joyce uses in this lesson is also Matthew 11:28-30 - I sat up and said WOW!!!! Coincidence?? Allen looked at me and said what? Ha! I am so amazed how God is showing His sweet, sweet face to me & clearly, without doubt!

Joyce uses Jesus' words as recorded in Matthew 11:28-30 (Amplified Bible)

Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy-laden and overburdened, and I will cause you to rest. [I will ease and relieve and refresh your souls.]

²⁹Take My yoke upon you and learn of Me, for I am gentle (meek) and humble (lowly) in heart, and you will find rest (relief and ease and refreshment and recreation and blessed quiet) for your souls.

³⁰For My yoke is wholesome (useful, good--not harsh, hard, sharp, or pressing, but comfortable, gracious, and pleasant), and My burden is light and easy to be borne.

In verse 29, He says "learn of Me" as in learn how I do things. He says "for I am gentle, humble in heart" and how often are we "gentle or humble in heart" when it comes to something we want, hoped for, or prayed for. In our society, it seems to be okay when we want something in life, to get it no matter what the cost or consequences (and I'm not talking about just monetary). We seek OUR will but not HIS will and then soon realize we have missed out on something.

In the last few weeks, I could have easily decided to use my sorrow as a tool to help me or as a crutch. While it is so easy to dwell on our problems or to rationalize them, what if we took the simple approach - Jesus' approach? Being able to completely surrender my will as been no easy task but it as been one of the most rewarding. It also has made me seek His will rather than my own, which His will is why we are here in the first place. I believe the trials we face are not because of anything we have done wrong (while we often think so) but simply because God is a merciful and sovereign God - He gives and He takes. Trials & sorrow also allows us to put things in perceptive - what really is most important to us?

This particular verse spoke to me in so many ways! And is still speaking to me. What an amazing God we serve...He tells us to allow Him to do the work and He wants us to have rested souls. After all, He did fight the good fight for His. There are SO many things I have learned and am learning through the trials and sorrow I have dealt with over the past few months. I am almost giddy inside because I am so thankful that God is using those sorrows to draw me closer to Him. While I do not know lots of things in this life/world, I do know that the ONE thing I can hold on too and the ONE thing I know that is never-changing and that is my Savior, Jesus! And because of that I know...I can carry on...I do not have to be tired, sad, depressed, or worried for I know Jesus has taken care of ALL of those things for me! I encourage you to let Him take up your heavy-laden and overburdened heart, seek His ways and how He would handle your situation or circumstances - allow Him to do the work He has already done for you so many years ago when He died on the cross for YOU! His ways and thoughts are so much greater than ours and we must be willing to surrender ourselves to Him so we can discover His will for our lives - not our own.

"Lord, I give You my heart, I give You my soul, I live for You alone
Every Breath I take, Every moment I'm awake
Lord, have Your way in me"

This is My Desire

This is my desire, to honour You
Lord with all my heart I worship You
all I have within me
I give You praise
all that I adore is in You

Chorus:

Lord I give You my heart
I give You my soul
I live for You alone
Every breath that I take
Every moment I'm awake
Lord have Your way in me

This is my desire, to honour You
Lord with all my heart I worship You
all I have within me
I give You praise
all that I adore is in You

Song by Hillsong - click here to listen to song on YouTube
(open link in new window)

I highlighted the chorus in red because it will now my daily prayer each morning - I was listening to Hillsong this morning & for some reason those words made me think - have I given ALL of me to Him? And do I give ALL of me to Him everyday? It's so easy to get caught up in the crazy and busy-ness of this world...we miss out on just loving & praising Him!