Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Give 'em Grace

With my eyes still closed, praying under my breath "please Lord, just 30 more minutes of sleep!"  Okay...I give up!

Because let's be real - sleeping in is a thing of the past.

This is how I spend almost every morning, all while a 21 month old little boy (how in the world is he almost 2???) flips and tosses around in our bed as a little fish.  Clearly, ready to start the day.  While I feel like I'm still dragging for the day before.

And the day before that.

And the day before that.

Wondering why it seems like there is always dishes piled up in the sink.  Why I'm the only mother who can't seem to get it together.  Who clearly needs help in the cleaning department as I start the same load of laundry for the third time.  Or who needs therapy  since I feel like I'm a crazy train that just won't stop.  All the while, I'm the one driving this train.

Motherhood is non-stop.  Life is non-stop.  The days are non-stop.

Then all of a sudden you look up and you are wondering where in the world the time has gone.

Not only is motherhood non-stop.  It can also be so discouraging.  Almost on a daily basis.

I think it has to do with our own expectations.  Of what kind of mother we should be -whatever that means, what kind of mother we thought we would be (organized, have it all together, skinny & hip - for the record I am none of those), and just what we "think" motherhood should look like based on what others look like or have. 

I fall into this trap so often.
Social media can be wonderful, but it can also rob us of the very things that bring us joy.
It allows doubt, insecurity, and bitterness to creep in.  It only allows us to see the "best" in people's lives.  The glimpses of what people want us to see.  The perfect home.  The perfectly dressed or behaved toddler.  The perfect vacation.  The perfect life.

Don't get me wrong, I'd rather that than negative Nancy all day long.  I am all for these things and love seeing them, but I think it also allows the enemy to attack us.  To attack our sweet souls that are already thirsting for something this world can not give.

Perfect homes, perfectly dressed, well-behaved toddlers, the perfect vacation, or perfect life is just not real life.  We all have messes in our lives.  We all have struggles.

Yet, we still allow ourselves to compare each other.  In almost ever facet of our lives.

And all through the lens of a computer or phone screen.

There are days I just want to throw my phone in the trash.  All because I covet worldly things.

After talking to other sweet mommas, I realize it is not just me.  I am not alone in trying to navigate the waters of motherhood, social media, and the struggles that come with it.  Whether they be in the flesh or in the spirit.

While we often see "highlight reels" on social media - what about the things people don't see.  The struggles us as moms face.  The struggles us as wives face.  The struggles our kids face.

Those things are real.  So why do we not openly discuss those things?  Why do we not encourage each other?

It's much easier to protray a life of "all is good", than brokenness or struggles.  None of us want others to see or know our brokenness.  For if they do, we might be seen as weak, or not having it all together.

Well, let's be honest.  No one has it "all together!"  No one.  We are all broken.  In some way, shape or form.
Motherhood can be such a lonely world.  We feel like we have to do it alone.  We have to face each day with our best foot forward, regardless if we are falling apart inside.

We feel we have to do it all.  Because if we don't, then who will?

We carry the burdens of our families.  The feelings of our husbands and children.  The laundry basket to the washer, the dishes to the sink, the socks to the laundry basket, our sweet children everywhere we go -even when they aren't with us, and we carry our dreams for ourselves, our husband, and our children.  We even carry fake smiles for when we just aren't feeling it that day.

We carry it all.

So while we often feel alone, we really we aren't alone.

There are so many other mommas struggling.  Just like myself.  Praying under their breath for just a few more minutes of rest.  Praying for strength for the day.  Praying for patience.  Praying for peace.  Praying for the storm to pass.  Praying for her marriage.  Praying for a break-through.  Praying for grace.

Again.  And again.

If I've learned anything in my longest days of my life short 21 months of motherhood, is grace.

"Give 'em grace..."

God whispers that to me on a daily basis.  He knows I am going to screw up.  He knows I'm going to fall short.  He knows it allAll of it.  He sees me struggling.  He sees me carrying that fake smile into Wal-Mart.  He sees me at my worst.  Even when no one else does.  He sees my brokenness.  He sees and knows it all.

Yet, He still decided to entrust with me with a little person.

So go and give 'em grace.  Give your children grace.  Give other mommas grace.  But most importantly, give yourself grace.

Every single day.

You are the best momma your child has.  You are the momma your child needs.  As scary as this sounds (to me anyway), you are the exact mother God knew your child needed.

Nothing more.  Nothing less.

So instead of showing only the highlights of our lives, show your brokenness.  For in our brokenness is where His light shines the brightest.  And because through the hard times, through the cracks, and through our struggles is where He gives us grace.

And His grace is enough.


  1. What a beautifully written post. I can totally relate to the daily struggles of motherhood, but its so nice to see I'm not the only one.

  2. Thanks Shannon! Motherhood can be so wonderful, yet so difficult. We're in this together!